


Heart to Heart

by Nelkere



Series: Family Ties [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-01 05:28:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12149598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nelkere/pseuds/Nelkere
Summary: This is part of a multi-part story I did with some OC's of mine. A mother and daughter have a long overdue talk





	1. Heart to Heart

Katra stared at the imposing walls of the capital’s hospital from behind bushes, it’s alabaster exterior seeming to pulsate in the waning pink sunlight. It was old -far older than even her- and had seen billions pass through its doors, some for the last time in their lives. The former Captain of the Royal Guard could count on one hand the times she had passed inside over the millennia, each time a turning point in her life. She had, of course, escorted the Queen and her child to it. As she had done with countless of her closest subordinates for thousands of years. Only twice was she a patient.  
Tonight was different, though. Tonight, she wasn’t here as an escort, or a patient. Rather, she was a visitor -a banned visitor, but a visitor nonetheless. Goddess forgive me. Her head turned to the left, her eyes tracking supply trams heading into the hospital. Every tram was stopped and checked briefly by guardsmen -many of them personally instructed by Katra herself. Undoubtedly, they had all been informed of her recent… fall from grace, and given specific instructions about if she tried to enter. _Maybe I can still persuade some to let me in,_ she thought, creeping closer. Still hidden, she contemplated warping inside and simply bypassing the Guard. _They’ll know. Likely assume it’s an assassination attempt then._ Katra grimaced disapprovingly. True, she had trained the majority of the Royal Guard, but now from the outside, she grew to regret such an action. It made them almost as paranoid as her when it came to doing their duty.  
Katra waited for what seemed like hours, watching the guards and any vehicle that arrived, waiting for the best opportunity. Eventually, the Guard change came, and she saw her chance. The new Guardsmen were some of the newly graduated officers, and ones who were bottom of their class. She smirked. _They just made it too easy._  
Standing up, she straightened her uniform as best she could, though her face and hair spoke volumes to the weeks since the duel. As she walked towards the front entrance, the lead Guard stepped forward, clumsily leveling his particle lance. “Halt! St-state your name and purpose,” he stammered.  
Katra’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Ko, if you want to seem like an authority, stop your blasted stuttering. And aim properly, chiridan.” She walked closer, eyes sweeping both Ko and his partner, who stood by looking dumbfounded. _Tak, I believe,_ she thought.  
“Tak, If your partner is attempting to stop someone, you should back him up. Or did you plan on him getting killed?”  
Tak blinked, then scrambled to level his own rifle at Katra. “You can’t hurt us, Ma’am.”  
“Really? How’s your shoulder doing? It ever heal from your last lesson?”  
He frowned, casting his eyes down. “We have orders not to let you enter, Katra. Lethal f-”  
Katra waved him away, rolling her eyes, “Yes, yes. Lethal force if necessary. Who do you think made those regulations?” She let her statement hang in the air as a silent challenge. “I think we all know how this will go. Let me pass, and when you get put in the brig, you can tell Pana that I was too fast for you. The hag can’t fault you for attempting to do your job.”  
"You always did.”  
“Tak, d-don’t”  
“Yes Tak. Don’t,” Katra stared at the Fae-type. “We all know even unarmed, that I can kill you. Let me pass, and there will be no bloodshed.”  
Tak stood silently, his lance aimed at Katra’s chest. Eventually, he lowered his weapon. “Fine. Go. The Empress will have you executed if she finds you anyways.”  
“She won’t find me.” _Not yet, anyways._ “Just give me 10 minutes before you raise the alarm.”  
Ko lowered his lance. “T-ten?”  
Katra nodded, slowly walking past the two, “Like Tak said, you two are just doing your jobs.” Immediately, she darted forward, warping past the door and into the main hallway of the hospital. _Now… what wing is she in?_ Katra walked up to to the main desk and turned on the guest console, typing in a name. The console chirped quietly, the words ‘Royalty Recovery Ward’ briefly flashing before going dark. _Great… That ward again._ Katra frowned and closed her eyes, warping to the Royalty ward. A few wisps of smoke clung to her clothing, dissipating rapidly.

The Ward was dimly lit, with only a couple lights on, and all but one room darkened completely. Slowly, she walked towards the lit room. Thoughts raced through her mind as each step drew her closer to the room.  
Stopping at the door to the room, Katra looked in, squinting as her eyes adjusted to the brightness. Inside, a girl lay on a medical bed, hooked up to several machines. _Oh, Kena…_ Katra looked down, entering the room. She sat down in a plain chair at the foot of the bed, staring at her feet in silence. 

Kena slowly opened her eyes, her vision partially blurred as she looked around the room. “Mom?” Her voice was dry and cracked, signs of the weeks of recovery. Several bandages criss-crossed her abdomen, visible only through the slight opening in her medical gown.  
Katra didn’t look up. “Glad you’re awake.” Kena groaned as she tried to push herself up. “Don’t push yourself. It’ll take a while to heal.”  
“Why are you here?” Kena cocked her head ever so slightly, looking at her mother.  
“I…” Katra looked up, her face suddenly years older, far more fatigued than Kena had seen her before. “I wanted to see you, Kena.”  
Kena blinked. “...What’s wrong?”  
Katra tried to smile. “I was a terrible mother, wasn’t I?”  
“I don’t understand.”  
Katra gestured to her daughter’s stomach. “I stabbed you.”  
Kena glanced down, then back up to her mother. Her voice was quiet. “You killed Daddy…”  
“...” Katra’s breathe caught in her throat. What Kena said was true, if not a little narrow. “Neren asked it of me, Kena.”  
“But you killed him.”  
“Kena… You were too young to understand what happened. He was…” Her voice trailed off, not wanting to explain how her husband died.  
“Then tell me, please?” Even tired, Kena’s voice exuded innocence and hurt.  
“Your father… He had an accident when you were little.”  
“So you killed him?”  
“He asked me to. He…” Katra looked at Kena, her voice catching in her throat. “He didn’t want to be bound to a chair for the rest of his life. He couldn’t stand not being able to play with you like he used to.”  
“But why did you kill him?”  
Katra sighed. “Neren was miserable. As much as he couldn’t stand to not be a part of your life like before, he didn’t want to be a burden on us- our marriage.” Her voice tightened. “He was the love of my life and he asked me to give him an honorable death.  
How could I deny him that?” Katra fell silent, waiting for Kena to ask her something else.  
Instead, Kena was quiet, staring at her mother as if waiting for her to continue. Katra swallowed, trying to find the words to say. “I, uh… I was never a good parent. That was Neren’s role. After he died, I didn’t exactly know what to do. I was scared. So I threw myself into my job more when I should have been there more for you than… well…”  
“Than you were?” Kena finished, her head still cocked.  
“Yeah…” Katra nodded, wringing her hands together. She paced around for a moment, letting Kena's words sink in. She was right, of course, but her words stung. “I probably failed my first duty, didn’t I?” She forced a laugh. “For Nyx’s sake, my own sister knows my daughter better than I.”  
“You were busy protecting the Crown,” Kena offered, “No one can fault you for that.”  
“No one?” She scoffed. “I neglect my child for over a thousand years, focusing more on training people how to kill. I force her to take pills that simply mitigated her hormones rather than see if there was anything that could fix it completely. Hells, I made it so you didn’t know what sex was until three hundred years ago!”  
Kena muttered under her breath, “I knew about sex before that…”  
“I try to treat you as a subordinate instead of my child, Kena. What mother does that? Tell me, what mother does that? Your grandmother taught us to balance work with family. And what did I do? I made work become my family.”  
“It’s not like I was alone, Mother…. I had Chala..”  
“But I wasn’t a parent to you!” Katra stood up suddenly, making Kena flinch. “What was I if not just your Commander?” Katra started to pace at the foot of Kena’s bed. “And yet, I still thought I could play a part in your life as a parent. I sabotaged all your relationships, sending most of them to the far edges of our Empire. I isolate you on a ship full of people too scared of me to approach you. I make it clear that you weren’t to be touched by any love interests.  
“And then… And then we get trapped on Earth,” Katra spat those words. “And you meet him.” Momentarily, her eyes flashed with fury. “And try as I may to keep you from him, try as I might to wipe him and his miserable race from the planet, they live. And you’re fucking him.”  
“He… he’s very sweet, once you get to know him, Mother.”  
Katra waved Kena’s comment away. “I’ve heard that line many times, Kena. I wanted him dead,” Katra looked at her child. “I hate him. I hate his species. I hate how he reminds me of N-” Katra cut herself off, letting the sentence hang in the air between the two Eldari.  
Kena blinked, her pink eyes staring into her mother. Momentarily, Katra met her gaze, then looked away. “You love him, don’t you?”  
Kena nodded slowly. “He… he makes me feel normal. Like I’m not Auntie’s niece.”  
Katra forced another spiteful laugh. “But he’s not Eldari.”  
“He can warp.”  
“Don’t remind me.”  
The two of them fell silent. Katra stopped pacing, and looked at her daughter, thinking. “I… I guess this is my apology for what I did to you. I do love you, Kena’merh.” She tried to smile again.  
Kena smiled in return, her almost too big smile. “I love you too, Mother.”  
A loud crashing noise echoed through the Ward, followed by the heavy footfalls of armored soldiers ran in, heading towards their location. For the first time in centuries, Katra was scared. And for the first time in her life, she ran, warping away just as several Royal Guard and her sister, Yumine, burst into the room. Only a few wisps of smoke remained as evidence of her presence.


	2. Small talk

_It’s cold… ___  
Kena looked down at her chest, at the blade tip jutting from her, wisps of smoke still clinging to her clothes from her warp. She coughed once, blood flying from her mouth as she looked up at the person before her. “H-hi, Jaden.” Kena started to fall, only to be caught by Jaden. Around them, others stared in shocked silence. Her vision blackened suddenly, replaced instantly with blinding light as she tried to focus.  
Jaden shouted, his voice barely audible to her. “Katra!” He glared at Kena’s mother behind her. Katra’s face had gone white as she tried to register what had happened.  
Kena coughed again, sagging to the arena’s floor as her blood began to pool around her. Again her vision began to blacken. She smiled painfully, tiredly, up at Jaden. “Maybe I was tired….” Before the black took her, she saw her aunt launch herself towards them.  
\--  
“Papa?” Kena called out to the blurred figure in the distance. She was surrounded in white, as far as the eye could see.  
The figure seemed to turn to her, but it was to far away for her to make out their face.  
“Papa? Is that you?” She began to head towards the figure, first walking, then running. She didn’t know why, but she felt like she wouldn’t get another chance if she didn’t run. As she ran, the figure seemed to grow more distant. Again, her vision began to fade. 

__Kena opened her eyes, but she couldn’t make anything out. Just blurred shapes. “W-where am I?” She looked around, trying to make sense of her surroundings, when a blurred figure placed something over her face, bringing the blackness back._ _

__Once again, Kena found herself in whiteness.  
“Where am I?” She looked around, hoping to see at least something other than pure whiteness. Once again, she saw a blurred figure. This time, it stayed when she ran towards it, becoming clearer with each step. “Hello?” Kena squinted, trying to make out the face.  
Several moments later, she stopped, her breath caught in her throat. “Daddy?”  
Neren hadn’t aged a day from the last she had seen him. Sure, he seemed smaller, but she was also taller than back then. Silver stubble dotted his face -he never did shave fully.  
‘D-daddy?” she asked again, running to him. Neren turned to her, smiling sorrowfully as she drew near.  
“Hello, _patha.” _Neren’s voice was as soft as she remembered it, even thousands of years later. He opened his arms as Kena ran to him, enveloping her in a warm, yet regretful hug. As she sobbed, Neren held her closer. “It’s so good to see you again, Kena. But…” Neren pulled away slightly, worry in his eyes, “Why are you here? It’s not your time yet.”__  
Kena sniffled, looking up at her father. “B-but-” She tried to speak, but the words caught in her throat.  
“What is is, _patha?” _Neren cocked his head inquisitively, much in the same manner that Kena did.__  
“Mother… stabbed me.”  
Neren frowned. “She stabbed you? Why? How?”  
Kena looked down to her feet, silent. Her father knelt to meet her lowered gaze. “Kena’merh, you can tell me what happened. Please? Or do you not trust your father?”  
“... I got in the way….”  
“You got in the way...” Neren repeated, confused. “Kena, tell me what happened.”  
“I was stupid, Papa…” Kena whispered, shifting her eyes to the side.  
“Kena….” Neren Stood up, pulling Kena into another embrace. Tears started to roll down her face as he held her. _“Patha… _Did you attack her?”__  
“N-no…” Kena tried to stop her voice from cracking as she cried, “I didn’t want her to hurt him though….”  
“Him?” Neren cocked his head again, his mouth opening slightly before closing again. “I think I understand now,” He smiled softly, stroking his daughter’s hair. “Try not to be too hard on her, _patha. _It’s not easy to be in her shoes.”__  
“B-but…” Neren hugged Kena tightly, silencing her.  
“She likely saw the person as a threat and tried to protect you, little one. She does love you.”  
“B-but she…”  
“You were the only thing she looked forward to when you were a baby, you know? Please don’t let those memories of you be the only ones she has.”  
Kena looked up, confused. Neren once again began to fade out, slowly, almost reluctantly. “Papa? Don’t leave.”  
Neren placed a warm hand on her chest, above her heart. “I’ll always be here, my little princess.”  
“B-but I don’t want to be alone again…”  
“You’ve never been alone, Kena’merh. Not even once.” Neren smiled once more, half-faded. “Now go back, honey. You’re still alive, and I don’t want you to let go of that.”  
“Pa-papa?” Kena fell to her knees, sobbing. “I don't know if I can…”  
Neren’s hands cupped her face even as they faded away, still as warm as she remembered them. “You can. You are your stubborn mother’s equally stubborn daughter. Plus, you have plenty of time to see the other side. Now please, wake up, _patha.” _The last of Neren faded away, his words echoing quietly around Kena, mixing with the sound of her sobbing.__  
\----- 

______________________Kena slowly opened her eyes, her vision partially blurred as she looked around the room. “Mom?” Her voice was dry and cracked, a stark contrast to how she heard herself when she was talking to Neren. Several bandages criss-crossed her abdomen, covering the scarring wound caused by Katra weeks earlier. Occasionally, Kena’s sight faded into bright stars as jolts of brief agony coursed through her with each breath in.  
Katra didn’t look up from her chair. Her mother looked far older than she was, and far less… immune… to emotions. “Glad you’re awake,” Her own voice was weary and tense. _She looks terrible… ___  
Kena groaned as she tried to push herself up, screaming internally from the effort. Katra spoke, her words far less commanding than Kena thought Katra could ever be. “Don’t push yourself. It’ll take a while to heal.”  
“Why… why are you here?” Kena cocked her head ever so slightly, looking at her mother. _Why am I here? ___  
“I…” Katra looked up, her face strained, as if she was barely holding back a flood of emotions. “I wanted to see you, Kena.”  
Kena blinked, shocked at how… kind her mother sounded. “...What’s wrong?”  
Silence filled the room for an interminable moment. Katra tried to smile. “I was a terrible mother, wasn’t I?”  
_Were you even a mother? _“I don’t understand.” Kena’s head turned ever so slightly to one side as she looked at her mother.__  
Katra gestured to her daughter’s stomach. “I stabbed you.”  
Kena glanced down, then back up to her mother, her arm moving to cover the bandage. Her voice was quiet. “You killed Daddy…”  
“...” Katra sucked in a breath. Again she went silent, as if in thought. _Don’t lie again, please.. _“Neren asked it of me, Kena.”__  
“But you killed him.”  
“Kena… You were too young to understand what happened. He was…” Her voice trailed off- Kena knew she wasn’t telling her everything.  
“Then tell me, please?” Even tired, Kena’s emotions were strong, her voice filled with hurt, confusion, and self loathing.  
“Your father… He had an accident when you were little.”  
“So you killed him?” _Just tell me, Mother… Don’t hide again. ___

______________________________“He asked me to. He…” Katra looked at Kena, pain written into her face. “He didn’t want to be bound to a chair for the rest of his life. He couldn’t stand not being able to play with you like he used to.”  
“But why did you kill him?” _Papa wouldn’t ask to die from being hurt... _  
Katra sighed. “Neren was miserable. As much as he couldn’t stand to not be a part of your life like before, he didn’t want to be a burden on us- our marriage.” Her voice tightened. “He was the love of my life and he asked me to give him an honorable death. How could I deny him that?” Katra fell silent, waiting for Kena to ask her something else.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________________________________Instead, Kena was quiet, staring at her mother as if waiting for her to continue. Katra swallowed, trying to find the words to say. “I, uh… I was never a good parent.” _You were never a parent _“That was Neren’s role. It was all he ever wanted, and I wanted to give it to him. After he died, I didn’t exactly know what to do. I was scared. So I threw myself into my job more when I should have been there more for you than… well…”__  
“Than you were?” Kena finished, her head still cocked.  
“Yeah…” Katra nodded, wringing her hands together. “I probably failed my first duty, didn’t I?” She forced a laugh. “For Nyx’s sake, my own sister knows my daughter better than I.”  
“You were busy protecting the Crown,” Kena offered absently, “No one can fault you for that.” _Except the one who needed you the most. ___  
“No one?” She scoffed, suddenly far more animated than before. Her voice was filled with contempt, aimed at no one but herself. “I neglect my child for over a thousand years, focusing more on training people how to kill. I force her to take pills that simply mitigated her hormones rather than see if there was anything that could fix it completely. Hells, I made it so you didn’t know what sex was until three hundred years ago!”  
Kena muttered under her breath, more than a little derision barbing her words, “I knew about sex before that…”  
Katra went on, “I try to treat you as a subordinate instead of my child, Kena. What mother does that? Tell me, what mother does that? Your grandmother taught us to balance work with family. And what did I do? I made work become my family.”  
“It’s not like I was alone, Mother…. I had Chala..” _And Auntie… ___  
“But I wasn’t a parent to you!” Katra shot up from her chair, making Kena flinch. “What was I if not just your Commander?” Katra started to pace at the foot of Kena’s bed. “And yet, I still thought I could play a part in your life as a parent. I sabotaged all your relationships, sending most of them to the far edges of our Empire -Goddess knows if they are even alive anymore. I isolate you on a ship full of people too scared of me to approach you. I make it clear that you weren’t to be touched by any love interests.  
“And then… And then we get trapped on Earth,” Katra spat those words. “And you meet _him.” _Momentarily, her eyes flashed with fury. “And try as I may to keep you from him, try as I might to wipe him and his miserable race from the planet, they live. And you’re fucking him.”__  
“He… he’s very sweet, once you get to know him, Mother.”  
“I _don’t want _to get to know him.”__  
“Auntie Yumi seems to like him…”  
Katra waved Kena’s comment away. “I’ve heard that line many times, Kena. I wanted him dead,” Katra looked at her child. Kena watched as her chest rose and fell with each breath, waiting for her mother to continue. “I hate him. I hate his species. I hate how he took you further from me. I hate how you talk about him. I hate how doesn’t know his place. I hate how he reminds me of N-” Katra cut herself off, letting the sentence hang unfinished in the air between the two Eldari.  
Kena blinked, her pink eyes staring into her mother. Momentarily, Katra met her gaze, then looked away. “You love him, don’t you?” Katra asked, scorn mixing with genuine care.  
Kena nodded slowly. “He… he makes me feel normal. Like I’m not Auntie’s niece.” _Or your defective child ___  
Katra forced another laugh. “But he’s not Eldari.”  
“He can warp,” Kena supplied hopefully  
“Don’t remind me.”  
The two of them fell silent, as the room shook with noise. Shouts and heavy footfalls of soldiers echoed in from the hallway, growing louder with every second. Katra stopped pacing, and looked at her daughter, thinking. “I… I guess this is my apology for what I did to you. I do love you, Kena’merh.” She tried to smile again.  
Kena smiled in return, her almost too-big forced smile. “I-I love you too, Mother.”  
As the soldiers drew closer, Kena watched as her mother’s face changed to fear. For the first time in her entire life, Kena saw her mother was terrified. Katra’s eyes shifted from Kena, to the door, to the window, and then back to Kena. Slowly, Kena nodded, silently letting her mother leave. In an instant, Katra was gone, only wisps of smokes to greet the guardsmen as they burst into the room, weapons drawn. Yumine, her aunt, followed close behind them, her face stoic, even as her eyes burned with anger.  
Kena turned to look at her aunt, letting her head dip slightly as Yumi looked at her. “Greetings, Your Highness.”  
“Where is she?”  
Kena looked out the window, staring into the night sky, “I don’t know…”  
Yumi studied her niece, her face softening somewhat. “Did you find out what you needed, _Tosa?” ___  
“... No… But I think… I think it helps.”


End file.
